I Paint.

by Jenna Lillies

“Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.”
– Salvador Dali


Left An Impression On Me

I have a super strong love for this song.

It’s so weird, but I remember the first time I ever heard this song.  I was under the age of 3, I know this because I heard in the car with my parents, so they must have still been married, and it was around Christmas.  We were in DT Edmonton,  leaving an event that displayed,  as what I remember to be,  hundreds of amazing Christmas trees decorated in thousands of lights and beautiful themes, that were spectacular to an adult, but completely beyond our world to a child.

Beyond remembering what I was doing the night I heard this song, I also remember the image I had when hearing it for the first time.  I pictured George Harrison as a younger guy, with greased back dark hair, like Johnny Depp’s in “Cry Baby”.   Georgie was also wearing a navy pinstripe suit that was about 2 or 3 sizes to big for him, and shiny black shoes .  He sang into a mic from the 50’s.  He was in a room painted in a dark colour, almost black, with on bright light shining straight down on him, as he moved like Elvis on a black and white checkered floor.

Strange the memories you choose to keep.

5 cliches and 1 original

Even Cynical People Can be Inspired

If you know me well, you will know that I am not a fan of self help books or speakers.  I will roll my eyes to that crap faster than a 13 year old girl being lectured by her parents.

It sounds to preachy to take seriously!!!

Recently, I came across a posting on Facebook that managed to change my mind on SOME of that motivational junk that I think most of us all need to hear, or read every once in a while.

To be completely honest, I ended up giving my notice at my old job about 2 minutes after reading this, and I can admit that yes, I am starting to sound a little bit like one of “those people” with my realizations.

I was guilty of 7 0f the “9 Things You Might Be Doing That Are Making Your Life Suck”.

The 2 that don’t apply to myself:

“Pretending like you’re so evolved and over it, when you really just need to be human”.  I can throw a pretty good “shit fit” when it’s in order.


“Holding onto resentment, bitterness or hate”.  I pride myself on the fact I usually see a problem start burning and can resolve it before it explodes. If anything, these feelings leave to quickly.

I recommend taking a peek at this even if you HATE this sort of thing.   I promise, it’s short, not preachy and it might help you open up a little to things that you are doing that is bring some unhappiness in your life.



Blame Game, Epiphany and Holy Shit

I think I am starting to understand that things just don’t get handed to you, you really do have to plan and implement strategies to get what you want.

I have always worked hard in everything I do, however, I have found myself working hard with things that I don’t really enjoy.  While I had been getting caught up in jobs that pay the bills, but provide me with minimal growth, I had forgotten what I wanted.

2 months ago, I had a huge, slap me in the face, epiphany, and realized that I had been playing “the victim”.  I was bitching and complaining about somethings in my life, especially work.  For 2 years I would go to work, and instantly be frustrated with everything.  I was blaming this frustration on the hormonal mothers that came to the store, my emotionally unstable boss, I was even blaming my education on my unhappiness at work (“I went to college and this is where it got me” type blame) .  Everything was beginning to annoy me, which further pulled me into a victimize belief.  When finally I realized that I chose to work there, and nobody was keeping me there except me.  So I gave my boss 3 weeks notice, and started thinking about things that are important to me, and the things that I want.

This is a huge turning point in my life!  I finally feel a little bit more bubbly,  have more confidence, stopped playing the blame game, and I want to make steps forward in life, instead of just thinking about them.

For example, I have been wanting to create a blog for at least 5 years.  And for those 5 years, I have self sabotaged by tearing myself down, “Nobody wants to hear what you have to say” and “You don’t know anything about starting a blog”.  3 days ago, I decided that I would give it try, despite those thoughts.  Who knows, this may be a complete flop, or maybe someone will read this and think,  “Holy Shit, I feel that way too!” Either way, I can say that I’m doing it, and hoping for the “Holy Shit” reaction.